Saturday, July 16

kite flying

Dear friend,

The moon is full and so vibrantly bright tonight; it feels like a birthday present from God.  Today is my birthday, but more than that, it's a day of hope and celebration and people.  So many good, encouraging people walk beside me in all my doubts and fears and faith and crazy dreams.  These people make me who I am, and if you're reading this you're one of them.

Below is an old poem I wrote for a dear friend.  It's more silly and less structured than I usually am, but I hope you find the goodness in it.  I hope you have people that know you and are known by you.  I hope you feel loved and celebrated and accepted.  I hope, I hope, I hope.  I could write a book about all my hopes.  Maybe one day I will.

for steph.

Sometimes I dance in the aisles of the grocery store
And I remember pieces of who you used to be
A cage full of dreams and wings,
Yearning to be set free.
Rewind and freeze
Back to when we thought pop tarts were dinner
And a 401k was a marathon
And tables
Were strictly for dancing upon
And we took the long way because we weren’t in a hurry
"Busy" was an old person word
Right after mortgage
And just before worry

It wasn’t so much about the destination back then
The 9-5 paycheck to paycheck of making ends meet
Because if you have to pencil me in
If you spend all your time waiting for life to begin
If your goals turn into a means to an end
To a means to an end
It’ll never end

It’s in the journey
In between squiggly highways on maps
It’s the whisper of wind that says
Make your own path.
It’s the second you release a kite to the sky
And it grows wings and soars
So much higher than you thought it could
Or ever even expected it would
And suddenly, you realize that your hope is in flight.
You stop where you stood
Because your mind can’t wrap around
That while your feet are on the ground
Something beautiful is alive
And somehow it is tied
With a thread
back to you.

The truth is
That these are our days
You gotta shake yourself out of this haze
Dear friend,
If you keep worrying about what comes next
You’re gonna miss the best part of the movie.
Meeting life with breathless anticipation
Coffee and good friends and grand central station
Frayed jeans and loud music
Sometimes the best motivation

Isn’t money
Or success
Or seeming important

It’s dancing and exploring
And recklessly living

It's in having the grace
to be wildly forgiving

It’s in knowing that losing
Can be the best kind of winning

And having the strength to start 
from the beginning
when you
to quit

I don’t want to go down the checklist
Of graduation to college to fast-paced career
I refuse to live my life based off the fear
That when you color outside the lines
It’s not okay.
There’s freedom in knowing the whole world isn’t gray.

There will be
people in this life that will scoff at your dreams
But if we can’t see the forest for the trees
Maybe our broken eyes need to relearn how to see
It takes much more courage to believe
Than to break.
Giving up is easy but

Hope takes the biggest kind of strength.
Hope has faced disappointment and yet still chooses

It requires that we wrestle
all our fears and flaws
and still remain
vibrantly courageous
when faced with the unknown.
Keep holding your kite strings to the sky
and know-
everything is possible.
everything can fly.
everything can grow.

including us.

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